Nobody

is above the law”
They say.
And I agree. But not when it is with their definition of ‘law’
As observed in the animating cosmos within the Terran biosphere, few things seems to transcend the scientifically defined laws. It happens, although just as in relation to the make belief bullshit laws the inbreds use for oppression, it is very hard to observe or recreate.
But as it animates itself within the physical spectrum I agree.
Which is why anyone who attempts to get in my way with their make belief might have their and their relatives heart’s integrity tested by certain applied strain.
As utilised by earlier mentioned hard to observe deviations in regard to the overlapping laws as observed by intellectually defined science.
They do not even know what the words they use means anymore.

I know one thing about laws though.
They only hold power for as long as you believe in them.
The laws of aerodynamics eluded humanity until the first vagabonds dared defy them.
And it changed the entire infrastructure of humanity in a few decades.
And the previous iteration of the aerodynamic laws were rendered null and obsolete.

So I agree.
Nobody is above the law.
Except aviators. Pilots. Avian individuals.
They are both literally and figuratively above the law.
And when fired at, turned to ‘death from above’.
Having the ‘high ground’.
A superior being.

“Superhuman” stems from the linguistic composition where ‘super’ means above.
“Supernatural” carries the exact same meaning.

I love people who claims such things about the legal make belief.
Usually they look old and weak. No strong heart in them.
They appear like they are going to have a heart attack any moment.
And they look like they will not survive it.
In accordance with scientific law concerning natural homeostasis and biological integrity.
The only laws I care about until I have managed to transcend them.

Hearts shatter quite easily these days.
Because human integrity is more rare than diamonds.

All my work is for the betterment of humanity, without compromising it.
Like the transhumans who transcended the ground with mechanical contraptions.

Although mine is of a more supernatural nature.
If you find yourself in opposition to that, you are a force of entropy.
If you shatter at the interaction with my integrity, that is none of my problems.

Today

I decided to withdraw from the shooting range and my practice in marksmanship.
I simply do not feel it anymore in regard to that.
There is this subtle hostile mentality against people who refuse the vaccine.
They behave like.. I do not know. Hard to put it in words.
Irrationally irritated and angry. For no apparent reason.

I recognise this, because I struggle with the same issue due to my never-ending somatic pain. But I have become good at suppressing it and control it in public environment.
(I really only ventilate on my stupid blog here which hopefully nobody follows and reads)
I no longer enjoy being around such people at all, in general.
I have always preferred being alone. But even I realise that some socialising is necessary.
Now I feel like it is without any choice.
The fact that the people who are vaccinated becomes sick repeatedly is not a comforting observation. They are the ones who should be healthy.. right? Right?!

I guess I will stick to social isolation instead. I do not suffer from it anyway.
I have always preferred minding my own business.
Feels counterproductive investing into something that does not bring joy anyway.
That does not really constitute a hobby.

You know, it is one thing to have silly predictions about the future, based in deductive observation and calculation of probability.
And a completely different ballpark to see it unfold by the day.

The mass hysteria and mass extermination was supposed to only be ‘conspiracy theories’.
For fuck sake.

Well, I am not jeopardising my safety.
If the vaccine is not more safe than that..
Then I am happy I did not take it.
I like quarantine more.
At least one is alive.

I have been perfectly healthy (beyond my physical disability) 24/7 since before they even announced the pandemic.
Except a minor migraine during an incoming CME.

I guess it is as the others in the underworld says, that the vaccine truly is a mass extermination tool.
Then nothing else to do than waiting it out.

Do not worry

sweetie.
Time has not yet caught up.
It is the problem when ahead of the wave.
The wave of time. I see a couple of years before it arrives.
Like driving on a road where you look forward.
Knowing what is to come before you arrive there with the car.

This is the last year of being stalked by the retards.
The protection still holds. The imposers gets cancer.
Heart attacks, strokes or sudden deaths through crashes.
Next year their entire hold fades and it will be only you and me.

You are of those worth waiting for. I can smell you through the future reflections.
The sensation of you amplifying as the synchronicity approaches.
The event of reverberating temporal echoes.

Worry not. Your word stands.
Your no is no to other, so only the acceptance gets through.
All else suffers until death in their persistence.
If they trick you into consent to abuse you,
they trick themselves into consent being murdered.

You are not afraid.
That makes you the most attractive to me.
The hags way past their ‘best before date’ does not have that.
They only cause sensations of disgust and repulsion.
Making one enter voluntary celibacy and becoming asexual.

But not you.
Sweet little you.
You do not kick in the open door.
And that is how you win.
The way they cannot.

I successfully managed to perform cyclic regeneration in a being that has passed maturation.
If this holds ground the way infinity suggests, we will live for a very very long time Sweetie.
Just you and me.
When all other withers away and die in time.
We will grow old without growing old, and watch them go gracefully.

Whenever you are ready. Whenever you feel ready.
I am in no rush due to my findings.

Opinions

are a funny thing. An expression I come across rather often is the saying “opinions are not facts”. And this is true. In fact, there are quite few facts in life. If you boil it down to the essence of it.
I like to think of it in the line of constants and variables. Very few constants, that you can fairly without doubt verify to yourself. And very many (intended) variables that comes from them. This might be an important conceptualisation to get the greater context.
The only true constant I know of is ‘change’. Since it is the very thing that makes me alive. The fluctuations that vibrates my heart muscles animating me into life happens due to change. Biological rearrangement. And everything I perceive in my body thanks to it, also changes all the time. The only thing that seems immune to change is the ongoing change itself. If it were not, it would not be. If it ever changed into a state of never again changing, it would be ‘the great freeze’ of the Universe. Nothing would ever be again. No photons bouncing around affecting our retinas and changing electric signals in our brain changing thought animating comprehensive consciousness.
It is the only true conceptualised constant I can assume. Since my assumption is because of it – as a result of changing observation.

Next to that, not really qualifying as a true constant, since it is subject to change depending on the life form – would be choice. But this requires a certain level of sophistication to truly come off as choice. Especially conscious choice, which is much harder to achieve than one would believe. Even if the intellectualisation of it, the arrangement of symbols, implies conscious choice – can you consciously choose how to arrange it intellectually, or are you reciting something because your power to choose how to express is limited? Are you driven by instincts, or do you choose your behaviour?

These two, the true and semi-true constant allows an infinite amount of variables. Some of which could pass as fact depending on the context. But since the context is subject to change, also facts are subject to change. To a varying degree. Which is the entire point of integrity. To have structural integrity in the arrangement of energy. Gold is assumed to be of great integrity, since it is hard to replicate, change or break down. But it is a fact that it is subject to change, thus integrity even in those with a lot of it, can change.

This is why the obsession with facts is often proving lack of conscious choice. You choose to accept the “fact”, since it is simply easier than to question it. Which would be a more conscious choice. You may reach the conclusion that in the context of the moment, it is indeed a fact. But do you do this every time as in accordance with the constant of change? Or do you blindly accept it as an absolute fact? Which holds little difference from a constant.

In my opinion(!) people seem to carry around a big pile of facts. Some of which works, and some of which do not. In certain context they are facts, in other context they are not. You would know this if you were conscious enough to make a choice questioning the fact in the moment.

An opinion is not really much different from a fact, and momentarily, that is a fact. But only as arranged in this context. If you were partaking in an intellectual institution, which is nothing more than an arranged paradigm, energetic culture, then opinion differs from fact. But facts would not function without opinion. Because facts rarely question facts, it is usually opinions that questions facts.

I would say you need both to be an efficient thinker.
Be aware enough to observe functional facts in certain context, but also be opinionated enough to question if they work in all context.
Because all intellectual arrangement is, according to factual science in its essence, nothing more than an energetic structure taking shape in time and space. It is as valid as it is invalid depending on perspective.

The reason why people argue about facts and opinions, is according to my changing observation and conscious choice to attempt understanding it, due to their structure of variables holding weak integrity. People are throwing intellectual constructs of symbolism at each other, some of which holds greater or lesser integrity. It is essentially mental war. If you cannot win it, you can use different forms of defamation or discrediting. Which is also just opinions, and rarely facts. In some context they are facts, but in the ever animating motion of whatever the Universe as an energetic construct as perceived by the human brain is, they usually fade out as an opinion. A momentary opinion.

A personal opinion of mine regarding evolution: if it is indeed a fact, due to being a symbolic synonym to change, then the entire Universe ought to be evolving. Which would, in given enough time and space, render even the hardest of scientific facts as opinions eventually. They may have held ground for some million years, but beyond that nobody knows for certain due to the observable nature of change. Or evolution.

This is why I myself do not bother so much with facts and opinions. Because I know due to change in personality and perception stemming from it, that they most likely will phase out. Some remain longer due to structural integrity in the intellect, but mostly everything of all I have ever thought fades away eventually. I do not hold the same opinions or know the same facts as I did ten years ago. My person merely ten years ago appear alien to myself. When I look at photos of myself as an infant, I look nothing like I should look like.
Change is real. Real is change.
Reality comes into perceivable experience due to change.
Even time changes. Hence relativity as an observation of that.
Even the perception of time changes – so WHAT do we really know?

Those with a mind of a greater structural integrity can make better choices, and therefore choose what they choose to understand.
And my personal opinion, which is not a fact in this context, is that education has very little to do with it. Since education in many cases strips your ability to actually make conscious choices by arranging facts and making them facts to themselves. When a lot of it is essentially just opinion in the moment. Shorter or longer.

That is why, when people ask me for my opinions.
Do they mean now, yesterday or what I probably may assume due to expected change in the future?
When people try to use facts, have they properly questioned the fact themselves, or do they use it as a baseball bat for the opinion it rides on?

These are very important questions, since nobody I know of at least, has any idea whatsoever why Life exists.
Yet so many seem to be of the opinion that they have the absolute facts about it.

Personally, and that is conscious choice as I try to navigate my own process of change in life – I avoid that kind of people. Because they do not seem very conscious in the choices guiding their intellectual perception.

But in the greater context, it is just an opinion.
Not a fact. Because it is subject to change after all.

That oughta do it. ^^

That

was truly a movie indeed.
No wonder I have not heard about it.
It is one of those that you do not find.
It finds you when time is right.
Meet Joe Black

That one is getting shelf spot.
The title. Said it all.


Fick mig förstås att tänka på dig.
Varför skulle den inte ha gjort.
Det är den där känslan igen.

Som den gången.
Då några år sedan.
Det dog aldrig för mig.
Och kommer nog aldrig.
Vissa saker har inget slut.

Jag vet inte
hur många gånger
jag önskat den önskningen.
Men insett, att det inte alltid är så.
Även om det ibland varit så i mitt liv.
Om även omedvetet i stunden.
Även om det är inbillning.
Så är det nog mycket.
Jag hade tagit dem.
De fem minuterna.
Som du erbjöd.
Inte för mig själv.
Men delade med dig.
Och sträckt dem längre,
än jag sträckt de minuterna,
som jag upplevde med dig då.
Så lite, som kan dela så mycket.

Vissa upplevelser kan inga pengar köpa.
De förefaller helt värdelösa i jämförelse med.

Du är en.
🌹

Prepared

my safe room.
It feels more safe.
Like having insurance.
I have that unnerving feeling.
Deep within my bones.
Cannot sleep proper.
Like something is about to happen.
I have no idea what.
But the feeling keeps amplifying.
In the collective unconscious.
Like animals. Legging it.
Running from a disaster.
It began late 2015.
Has been rising ever since.
Now it is so intense it combats my pain.
It feels like running from a tidal wave.
Being so exhausted one cannot run.
But it is either pushing on, or certain death.
That is what it feels like.
It is not better that my synchronicity is all over the place.
Hopefully it is nothing. Hopefully I am wrong.
But I am not taking any chances.
I felt the same about three months before they publicly announced the pandemic.
And that one showed up in my synchronicity already in 2016.
I even made a visual allegory of the feeling I felt that day.
But I was completely oblivious to the symbolism.
It only made sense in retrospect.
‘Looking for meaning’ is one thing indeed.
But it does not explain the feeling.
So I can only guess.
And assume probability.
I am far from the only one.
Saying and feeling the same thing.
So I am not taking any chances.
Now I feel like I have outrun it a bit.
Allowing a breather.
Very short one.
There are things not even machines can pick up on.
Even the military said that.
Which is why they have dogs.

Whatever it is that makes me feel this way, it is not pleasant.
I can understand why animals flee if they get this feeling.
The ground is shaking. The aether is shaking.
Maybe it is war. Maybe it is the sun loading up.
Maybe it is nothing at all.

But I am not ignoring ‘omens’.
Not anymore.
Last time it almost cost me my life.

Situational awareness.
Life is for those paying attention.
Those who does not, become prey.

Now that

is what I am talking about.
Some proper pain in my body after yesterday’s effort.
But it was not as bad as I thought it would be.
After all, it is just pain.
My number two drug after water.

God I love this feeling.
The body becoming.
The mind strengthening.
The spirit animating.

I do not care about that screen then.
It is yet another proof to me how failed human society is.
You do not even get what you pay for.
As it always is.
Nature is better. Because it does not advertise.
It just produces.


So help me God.
To become.
So help me Universe.
To transcend.
So help me consciousness.
To ascend.
So help me nature.
To progress.
So help me life.
To illuminate.

I want to glow like you, like the sun.
I desire to be more than I can be.
I want it all. And I want more.
So please help me God.

I saw you yesterday during the walk.
Without a doubt was it you.
Taking form in a deer.
Walking with me.
In front of me.
Guiding me.
Leading me.

So help me God.
My only true friend.
The ego has nothing.
Nothing on you whatsoever.
It does not want the love.
It only gets in the way.
But does not lead.
Does not guide.

So help me God.
To remove them.
From the living.
Those who love.
Truly the love true.
They do not love.
Separate them.
Like the wheat,
from the chaff.

I see you
I see me
I see I
Eye
and
I

I

Fucking did it.
I FUCKING DID IT!
I FUCKING DID IT!

7 kilometers.
35 kilos. 35 fucking kilos.
THIRTY-FIVE FUCKING KILOS.
In 87 minutes.
IN EIGHTY-SEVEN FUCKING MINUTES.

First pic:
My body weight today: 50,7kg
Second pic:
Me with full clothing and shoes: 53,9kg
Third pic:
Me with full clothing, shoes standing on the dumbbells I was carrying in the hands with weight vest on and backpack loaded with weights: 85,6kg
(Hard to see since it was so hard taking that pic bending over loaded with so much weight on)

35kg is 70% of my body weight.
SEVENTY FUCKING PERCENT.

We. Are. Not. Equal.
Not. Even. Close.

Honestly though (nothing but the numbers above is serious, it is just me being happy).
Not bad considering I am missing at least one vital organ in my digestive system.
Now I have so much pain it is cancelling itself out. I cannot feel pain, because I have too much of it.

(And this is walking, not running. If you run, you do something different.
If you want to compare to me that is. The importance is the weight carried.
(weight to body weight percental ratio)
And the distance it is being carried. In the time it is being carried.
I cannot run due to my disability, the pain is simply too much.
So to me it is marching, or walking. As to say: always one foot on the ground.
The fastest you can move is just before you break into a jog.
It is probably not even a sport, but I compete against myself and do not compare.
If you are one of those, then stated above is the guidelines.
Otherwise it is just for perspective.)

This one was for you, dad.
This one was for you.
Congrats on the birthday.
You are the best. <3


I am living this song. The literal God knows how to inspire, motivate and push! <3

Have you ever

looked at humanity, with the absolute sensation of ..
You do not even have a word for it.
As far as I know.
Not disappointment.
Not disgust.
Not hatred.
Not contempt.
Not distrust.
Not disbelief.

But you know.
I imagine parents experience something similar.
When they give a gift at Christmas, and the kid is too spoiled to appreciate it.
You look at them.. like.. this is the best they can do.
That is literally the best they can do.
It is kind of a depressing understanding.
I have that with myself. I never meet my expectations.
Granted I set them higher than what is humanly possible in my situation.
So I understand it. But it is .. not depressing, but kind of similar.
I mean, I have life, and I love it. Far beyond most.
Because whenever I have one of those days, feeling like absolute shit..
There is nothing that ‘cures’ it – no addiction whatsoever.
Drugs, shopping, food or whatever people distract themselves with.
I realise I still have life.
Granted I love to edge, getting close to the edge. Almost dying.
Pushing myself so hard that I lose vision. Faint. Bleed internally.
So I get there. So that I can see over the ‘edge’ which is the … ‘portal’ .. to death.
It is when you are there, on the floor, catching breath, a heart almost stopping.
You see it. All. Everything. Beyond time. Beyond space. Beyond life.
You are all and nothing at once.
You can taste it when you have a really good orgasm, or when you are on psychedelics.
But nothing beats a near life experience. When you are so close to dead, that you almost are.

And then you come back, having seen that.
Having seen beyond it all.
And the first you see is some fucking societal inbreds fighting over words.
Make belief.
Like robots. Like machines. Like intellectual inbreds.
Incapable of transcending their ‘higher thinking’.
So much so that they take offense,
when someone says they only use 10% of their brain.
Which is usually a gross understatement.
They do not even realise that the entire body is the brain.
Indirectly. Since the body upholds the brain.
Yet you have these out of shape inbreds..
Who can barely walk properly, who insists they use 100% of their brain.
Yeah. Sure.

You are like..
You people do not even have a word for it.
Dead without being dead. Meaningless.
A waste of time. A waste of space. A waste of life.
A bunch of living mistakes.
So ignorant that they take life for granted.
So much so that they cry when people die.
As if they did not live. At all.

Have you ever been there?
With a heart on paus.
On the edge.
I have.
Hundreds of times.
So when I see humans.. ordinary humans.
I feel nothing. Nothing at all.
It is like being more dead, than actually dead.
When I am among them.
Because they make me feel nothing.
Like life does not matter.

And it.. ‘something‘ .. me.


The most relatable artwork I know in regard to this is the animation “World Record” from the movie Animatrix. It is as if everything in life *word that does not exist* you, but not life itself.
So you try to push it to the absolute edge, to the absolute limit.
And all you have is inbreds trying to fuck it up for you.
Because they cannot love life.
Only the stuff in it.

Made this

long before it became truly relevant. To myself.
My art tends to be ahead of its time.
My definition of success it not the same as those who thinks they know what reality is.
Something that cannot be known.
The most detached you can ever become from reality,
is if you think you know what reality is.
Something that cannot ever be known.
That is just fact.
And oh does the group hate that fact.
Which is why they hold on to their small platform of defined reality.
Their detachment from the absolute moment of now.
The gift of the present.
The gift of animated life.

With ‘the world’ I mean ‘human society’ – I was not as well versed back then.

People

be like:
So, you are a Christian?
And I be like: No.
And they go: But you believe in God?
And I respond: No.
They stutter: What?
And I say, with the greatest certainty in life: I know “God”. It is my best friend, because it gave me the gift of life. The greatest gift I have ever been given. Ever. In whatever existence is. Whatever eternal infinity of nothingness and everything that is really is and are, were and will be.
Confusingly they wonder: But does that not make you religious?
Before I respond I smash my head hard in the table in the attempt to reach their level of mental infancy: “God”, or “Nature”, or “Life”, or “Consciousness”, or “The Universe”, or “whateverthefuck” is bigger than religion to me. Much much much much bigger. Because all of them exists because of it. If a person does not get it, they are as good as dead already. Such a miserable state of life. Not even realising life flashing before their very eyes in every given moment of life. Every second. Every moment. Even here. Right now. Exactly here where you have your eyes right now. Life passes you by before you die they say. If you do not see it, you are already dead.
They: ….
And I conclude: Religion is just a fashion. Mental clothing. A special hat. Special words. Special behaviour. It is as legit as anything else. But you cannot contain everything in something. If you believe that, you are either tremendously stupid or even more tremendously stupid. To me they, religions or other paradigms, are just another one of God’s flowers. Hence why I respect them all for what they are. “God” is great. So great that nobody can really fathom how great it is. No religion or science know why we are here right now. Why you can read these words right now. What all of this is. Why this planet seem to be. Why we float around in time and space and just happen to be so that we can experience this. Nothing knows that, I know because I have studied most of them. But the more I studied, the more I found “God” to be everywhere. At all places at once. In all schools and paradigms, sciences and religions at once. No character, no personality, no judgement. It just allows life as the greatest gift given ever. The chance to wonder whatever the fuck life actually is and are, were and will be.

Defining

the unknown is by far one of the hardest things you can do in life – because it has never been done before. Nor can it be defined. Because the moment it is, it is known.

Realising this, one can assume that knowledge grows. You grow knowledge. And the more of it you have grown, the greater the foundation which constitutes your understanding. It takes knowledge to understand, but understanding to truly know.

This is why one should collect ideas. Because they are mental fertilisers.
All creation is merging of two or more different components. Because if there were no merging, everything would be in equilibrium. All destruction is the separation of two or more components.
This regardless of portion in the energy spectrum.

The mind thinking is a very volatile place if you are a true thinker. Constantly ideas merge and separate from each other. Like atoms and molecules. The more exotic the combination of ideas, the easier it is to reach the unknown.

Since the unknown is surrounding the known, it is not hard to reach per se. The hard part is to separate yourself from the known. As to say, to some extent destroy the automatic and autonomous nature of the ego – that is looping you back from the edge of the unknown through ideas such as denial, disbelief and doubt.
Once you reach the edge of the known, it like looking out from a window on an airplane. You have a vague idea what is there, but you cannot really fathom it.
That is when you initiate the growth of ideas.

It is as easy as it is hard. Because it has not been done before.
It is easy to do, just create something new.
The hard part is to integrate it.
And the even harder part is when it starts to question and challenge the integrity of what you knew. Because now your integrity and therefore entire definition of reality is in question.
This is usually where people loop back into the known.
They simply become scared of their mental platform being challenged.

Takes quite a lot of mental integrity to traverse the unknown.
Metaphorically, it is like walking in a deep forest, having no idea what is in it.
And your sight extends only a few meters ahead of you.

Integrity in that sense, is a ‘frienemy’ – because it can protect you if you are properly aware. But it can also inhibit you if you are unaware. As to say, one can be contained within one’s own ideas of reality. And it has composed ideas that in an automatic fashion loops the thinker back to ‘safety’.

Everyone wants to be safe. Because they are scared absolutely shitless of the unknown.
Downright terrified. Because deep within, they know they do not know. So their integrity is simply denial. Assuming to know and creating a mental barrier to the edge of the known. A kind of mental and intellectual insulation.
“It is not real”

Real is just an idea.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
Whatever you associate and ascribe to that idea will manifest as your reality.
Since most people are given an intellectual template which they never question, they rarely stray from the known. Denial, disbelief and doubts blocks them.

What do you know?
Truly. Because it is a good question. One of the better actually.
Because when you start to question yourself that question, you realise just how little you do know. If you stop asking that question, you loop back into the known.

So in conclusion, the fastest way to reach the unknown, is to question what you know.
You see now you are mentally engaged in the process of growing ideas. You have to. You have no choice.
A question is the receptive mental component, the attractive, the sensual and before your very ideas dancing concept that spark an answer. A formulated idea.
Combined they create something new. Hopefully.
The better your question, the greater the potential for a good idea in the shape of answer. And the better you are at questioning your answers, the more rapid the mental expansion.

So at first, you have to mentally grow towards the unknown by questioning all you know. Once you know what you know, how little that is, and its level of integrity – now comes the process of assimilation. Integrating ideas into what you think you know. This is the process of growing integrity. And you absolutely need it.
The integrity of your arranged knowledge, the sum of your ideas, is your mental vessel with which you traverse the unknown.
If it is not sufficiently integrated and of a strong integrity, you will lose yourself in the unknown.

Does not mean it is catastrophic, but it could be.
Your mind once it traverses outside the collectively known, operates in the fashion of a space station, or submarine. It is now its own enclosed mental intellectual system. Navigating the depths of the unknown.
And assuming infinity, that ought to be mind-boggling to say the least.

But it is also your greatest source of intellectual harvest.
If you are good at combining ideas and concepts in an integrated manner, now your intellectual entity grows, and your ability to traverse the unknown increases.

From what I have seen in the unknown, it is not even a question to me why the vast majority of humans are absolutely terrified of it. To the very point that they even deny that.
They take “reality” for granted.
But essentially, the definition of reality, the arrangement of ‘known’ is little more than an energetic arrangement.

The more novel and sophisticated that arrangement, the more attractive it becomes.
You are terrified, but your curiosity grabs you.
This because growth is life. As long as you are truly alive, you will be curious.
Otherwise you are dead. If not in your biological arrangement, so in your mental.

You must have and accept the unknown if you want to be alive. Truly alive.
Because it is only on that mental edge, where you can glimpse into whatever the fuck life actually is. And is not. If it even is. Why do I even write this?

I take comfort in being terrified before the unknown. I have been it for so long that my statement that the unknown is my best friend is no light expression.
I am constantly attempting to integrate newly grown ideas into my intellectual arrangement.

You see, I have a tremendously huge ego – but not in the conventional meaning of that saying. Because my ego is not autonomous by means of intellect. It has not been programmed to automatically loop back into the known through denial, disbelief and doubt.
Like the ones with small egos.
Usually, the people you say have a “huge ego” actually has a very small ego. Because they neither question themselves nor what they know – they take the reality for granted the way they have defined it. A very narrowminded and smallminded way to operate whatever the fuck existence actually is. No I am not excusing my cursing, because you need to realise the importance of this.
If you take offense from a linguistically arranged symbol with no actual meaning in the greater aspect of things – that is an absolute proof you have a very small mind.
You do not even question why you take offense from it. You do not question the context.
In fact, you probably do not question anything at all. More than what you should eat today.

Why can you eat?
What is that?
Beyond biological integration in the physical spectrum of energy.
As I said, why and how am I even writing this?
Not in the light sense of the words, but as in.. you know, and you do not know?
What is all of this.
Who are you.
Why are you reading this?
Right now?
Why does this happen?

That is just the awareness triggers that everyone needs to have.
The ongoing questioning of the perceived reality.
Once you crystallise a perfect definition of it, you are mentally stagnating.
Because now you are not attempting to integrate new ideas.
Now you are comparing your ideas to other ideas.
And since your definition of “reality” is perfect, it is dead.
It will not grow. It will not become anything more.
Because you think you know.

And you will never explore the unknown as long as you think you know.
Because you must literally think what you do not know to traverse the unknown.

CoA

The “Coat of Arms” visible in my Opus.
I made it a couple of years back.
As an artistic endeavour and fun experiment.
I am not sure exactly how the idea arose. It may have been because of some discussion about ancient stuff. As usual.
But I got curious, how I would make mine, if I made one.
It is not serious or official or anything. People do not care about that stuff too much these days anyway.
But it is always fun to try new kinds of art. It is also a great way to learn and know oneself.
Because you have to think about it. Consider it. Ask yourself. Come to idea and fruition.
So if for nothing else.. it is a fun thing.

I made several iterations before I settled with the current and final version.
There is really nothing to add to it anymore. It would just be redundant.

I mean, you should make yours. Just as a funny thought experiment.
The more unique and you, the funnier the task.
It is funny to look at them.
Because there is a lot of symbolism in all of them, legit and just funny artworks like my own.
Maybe yours go with rainbows and unicorns. Angels and demons. Bricks and tools. Cars and bikes. Planes and parachutes. Animals and plants.
You also have to symbolically summarise your endeavours and achievements. Real to you or real to the world – since it is just a fun thing at the end of day anyway.

I encourage you. It is funnier than you think. And the more you define yourself, the more you will be inspired by yourself in the future. When your own art inspires you, you have reached perpetual artistic motion.

Everything in mine means something. Of itself and in conjunction with everything else.
It required some thinking, therefore several iterations over the years I played around with it.

But no, it does not mean anything official.
Just a fun thing symbolising things I have collected mentally throughout life.

Some people wonder why the Greek language.
Mostly because it constitutes a major part in the foundation of English.
It was part of my studies in linguistic neurogenetics and its development over time. How symbolism morphs through cultures over time. It was truly an interesting endeavour and study. But I do not know (modern) Greek in the literary sense (since this was more concerning ancient Greek). It was more one subfield within neurogenetics. Since intellectual communication is a central part of that field, when it concerns humans.

Earlier outcasts and versions that did not last long:
Yes, I even attempted studying Hebrew at one time, since it is a very interesting language from a mathematical viewpoint – which makes it even more interesting in relation to neurogenetics and patterns of thinking and arranging symbolism.
But it dropped in the midst of everything else. The learning curve is too steep if one does not make it a main priority.
But I like that slang. Both its symbolism, and the way it sounds when it is said. Has a very pleasant synesthetic colour to it.
I first caught it when listening to Infected Mushroom’s song “End of the road”, and the sound of that word/slang immediately caught my attention, because of how it sounded.
It is one of my many favourite words/slang.

I was what I am

I was

a weird person.
One of the weirder ones.
an alone person.
Lonelier than most here.

I was

a funny person.
But never intentionally.
a crazy person.
Whether I wanted or not.

I was

a knowing person.
Too smart for my own good.
an oblivious person.
But I knew that as well.

I was

with weird ideas.
As only a weird person can be.
with rare endeavours.
Nobody else wanted to do it.

I was

so fucking tired.
Maybe you know what I mean.
wandering endlessly.
But I knew exactly where.

I am

whatever I am.
But that has never been enough.
myself, has always been.
But that most certainly is not enough.

I am

what I have become.
The love for life is ever-present.
never really in fear.
I do not know enough to be.

I am

a very curious person.
To what is to come, whatever may.
never more than I can.
And it has always been enough for me.

I am

not one of those.
One of all the others out there.
not human at all.
They just insist on me being.

Just because I have one of their bodies.

I am.
Curious expression.
Statement of becoming.
I was I am.
I am I was.
Am I what I was?
Was I what I am?

My

personal take on one of our most famous national symbols:

Obviously, to me personally, it is a reference to the Trinity.
Physical, Mental, Supernatural
Body, Mind, Spirit
Female, Male, Balance
Mother, Father, Child
Negative, Positive, Neutral

To me it simply means that the three most major spectra in the existential spectrum of energy has been properly mastered, balanced and/or understood in symbolism; now, or to be – since time is not linear to me in my perception.
The past builds the future; the future understand the past.

It is a conceptual triangulation within the existence, defining a national character enabled to express itself as a living entity.

Does not mean that it is the absolute meaning nor that I am absolutely right – it is a personal take.
But I love building my own personal associations, as inspired by the many mental cultures I have traversed.
It makes it easier to enjoy life.
And to read personal synchronicity.

Simple conceptualisation in imagery:
Because trinity can only arise when duality is balanced.
When bipolarity phase cancel itself out, the quantum state is achieved.
It is symbolical mitosis.
If physical it is reproduction.
If mental it is artistic.
If spiritual it is becoming.

Hence the saying ‘the kingdom comes’

Do not

Do not worry.
There is no such thing as death.
Only becoming.
You have become so many times.
You have forgotten.
Like going to work all day all days.
Routine repeating.
There is no such thing as death.
Only love for life.
In shape of becoming again.
On and again.

Think of all you want, can and will become.

Wonderous thought

Do deaf people conceptualise the nature of motion while moving the hands as different forms of symbolic iteration?
As to say, the more flowing the movement, the softer the communication; The stiffer and more rigid the arrangement, the rougher the symbolic expression?

I observe that in people, but for a different reason.
It gives me understanding of their biological integration.
Subtle more flowing body movements usually hints at higher sophistication, as it requires more micromovements – hence integrated consciousness; feeling the muscles. Some people move like they float through space and time.
Other like they are mechanical in their patterns.